Friday 25 July 2014

Slade Park Fire Station - Open Day Sat 26 July

Slade Park Fire Station to stage an open day

Horspath Driftway

OX3 7JG Headington

A free fundraising event where locals can see how their fire station operates will take place in Headington on Saturday 26 July.

Firefighters at Slade Park Fire Station in Horspath Driftway will carry out a range of demonstrations, including ladder climbs and road traffic accident rescues, from midday to 4pm.

Visitors can also handle fire fighting and rescue equipment; enjoy demonstrations from the Slade Park Fire Cadets and learn more about Oxfordshire County Council’s Fire and Rescue Service via information stands and talking to operational crews.

The station, which has dealt with more than 500 call-outs over the past six months and where 28 wholetime and 11 on-call firefighters work, will also lay on activities for children - including the chance to soak fire fighters using buckets and sponges; squirting water from hoses; face-painting/ tattoos; a lucky dip and a tour around the fire engines.

Crews will be raising cash for The Fire Fighters Charity, an organisation dedicated to supporting serving and ex-personnel and their families. People can find out more about becoming an On-Call fire fighters and about the history of Oxfordshire Fire and Rescue Service, which is celebrating its 40th anniversary this year.

Fire crews from the Slade Park Fire Station will also be celebrating 15 years of working together with the British Red Cross, who provide volunteers that crew a Fire Emergency Support vehicle based at the station.

Station Commander Guy Dunkley said: "We really see ourselves at Slade Park Fire Station as a big part of the Headington community and this open day is a great opportunity for the people we serve and to show how their firefighters operate.

"There will be plenty of activities for all ages to enjoy, from practical demonstrations to learning more about Oxfordshire County Council’s Fire and Rescue Service, and everybody at Slade Park Fire Station looks forward to meeting those who come to the open day."

Article from Slade Park Fire Station

We think this news story will be of interest to our visitors. However, please note it is from another source and does not necessarily represent the views of Oxondads. If you would like to comment on this article please click on the "No Comments" below or alternatively E-Mail info@oxondads.co.uk

Things To Do Over The Weekend in and Around Oxfordshire

To find out what is on over the weekend via "Daily Info, Oxford" please click HERE

To find out what is on over the weekend via "Oxford Mail " please click HERE

To find out what is on over the weekend via "Jack FM" please click HERE

Resolving arguments in a stepfamily

All families have conflicts. In stepfamilies, arguments and disagreements can take on a new tone and significance. Stepparents worry about children being rude, defiant and disobedient. Parents worry about what happens when they leave their children with their partners and whether they will be aggressive or uncooperative. Stepparents often say their stepchildren only seem to show that side of themselves when their parent isn’t there.

What is bad behaviour really about?

Children often find it hard to understand or explain their feelings. So, they tend to ‘act them out’. Children need to have their own response to the new family acknowledged. If children ‘defy’ you, it’s better to dive under the behaviour to understand what’s going on than get into a head to head fight. All behaviour is a way of getting what you need. Bad behaviour is actually a way of trying to show bad feelings.

Why children fight to get control

When families break up and reform, children can feel utterly powerless. This can lead to their trying to gain some control and exercise some choice in their lives, often with drastic and sometimes confusing effect.

The original meaning of the word ‘discipline’ is ‘to teach’. Discipline is something we do to help children learn. And the best way to get children to behave in ways that please us is to help them understand what they actually want and need, and to see how they can get those needs met in ways that don’t upset other people. Respond to the underlying need rather than the ‘bad behaviour’ and the child’s reason for behaving that way melts away.

Getting our own needs met

The best way of ‘disciplining’ children is often to set out to help, not punish them. It may not seem like it sometimes, but children want to please their parents and win their approval. When they feel we have understood what they need, and can understand us in turn, they have the incentive to change. If you can tell them clearly what you want and why, and respect and listen to them, you’ll get a better result than simply coming down hard on them. Whenever you find yourself feeling fraught the best strategy is to say to the other person

“When …(describe the situation)
I feel…(describe your emotions)
Because…(explain why the situation makes you feel this way)
What I would like is…(give a clear and direct description of what you’d prefer)

How to put a name to feelings

All of us have feelings. At times, we feel happy, sad, angry, rejected, confused and much more. However, many of us have picked up from parents and other influences the idea that some feelings are ‘bad’. Feeling angry is often seen to be unacceptable; so is being jealous. When we have these feelings we feel guilty or blame others.

In reality, all feelings are natural and having them is normal. Feelings are just feelings – we can’t help them and there’s no shame in having them. What we can help is what we do about them.

Often, we can’t deal with the emotion we are feeling because we don’t know what it really is. Children particularly can find it hard to put into words what they are actually experiencing. Using this technique can help you and anyone else isolate, understand and put a name to the feelings.

Get some slips of paper and write out all the ‘feeling’ words you can think of, like ‘angry’ ‘cheerful’, ‘abandoned’, ‘scared’, ‘secure’, or whatever you can come up with. Spread them out and talk them through to pinpoint the word that best describes what you are feeling. You or the other person may be angry. Or, you might be feeling abandoned or worried or embarrassed. Once you know what it is you can discuss why the feelings are there and what you might do about it. Simply acknowledging the real emotion and realising you don't have to feel guilty for having it can help and often makes the feeling diminish or lose its power.

Sometimes this is enough. Other times, we may need to help our children sort out what they are going to do once the first flush of emotions has died down.

Dealing with anger

Anger can have an important function. Just as pain tells you not to lean on a hot stove, so anger tells you that what is happening is not acceptable and that something needs to change. There are other feelings underneath anger – fear, sadness, worry, frustration – and working out what these are will help us to identify what is really upsetting us and what we’d like to be different.

Both adults and children in a stepfamily situation may often find themselves feeling angry, and find it difficult to deal with the strong emotions. Expressing anger can help us regain a sense of control and deal with any underlying resentments. Ultimately, it can be a first step towards strengthening our relationships.

Understanding what is underneath the behaviour

It’s not discipline in the form of punishment or control that children need when they behave badly in a stepfamily situation. What is underneath their behaviour is often a need for attention, acceptance, appreciation, and some independence. They are often fighting to get these when they act up. We can help them by;

talking openly about the change or loss that has lead to their being in a stepfamily
helping them show their feelings
sharing our own feelings with them
telling them it’s OK to feel bad, even if other people in the family are happy about the change
telling them what’s going to happen and asking their opinions
making sure some things don’t change
helping them keep in touch with people, places, things that matter to them
cutting them some slack and accepting they will act up

Making our own choices and helping children make theirs

When it comes to a stepfamily, it’s the adults who choose to be there, not the children. Choose to act in ways that make that choice work- that may mean having to let go some elements to give your children some choice and more control of their own.

Kids are far more likely to co-operate if they feel trusted and part of a team, and asked what they want rather than told what you don’t. Giving them responsibility and choices neatly sidesteps disagreements. Instead of scratching your head about how to punish them, use another form of discipline – positive learning. Build a close relationship with them so they trust you to give them attention and understanding. Notice and acknowledge their strengths and achievements. Let them make decisions wherever possible. You’ll soon notice they don’t need to be disciplined in the form of punishment at all

Article taken from FamilyLives.org.uk

Wednesday 23 July 2014

Have a Teenager Who Likes a Tipple ?

Article from Dadzclub.com

Scientists claim to have developed a way of predicting which teenagers are likely to binge-drink.

A combination of 40 factors, including brain structure, personality and major life events, were used to produce the test.

It can predict, with 70% accuracy, which 14-year-olds are likely to binge-drink at 16.

An international group of scientists have now conducted the largest study of its type to find a way of predicting which teenagers will go on to binge-drink.

They looked at a huge array of variables, including family history, exposure to alcohol, neuroticism, extravagance, conscientiousness and other personality traits, a suite of genes, brain volume, how the brain responds to reward and many more.

Dr Robert Whelan, of University College Dublin, told the BBC: "There is no one really big thing. It's a bunch of little things adding up to give you this prediction.

"There are three main areas: brain activity and brain structure; personality, so seeking out new things to do increases the risk, whereas conscious tends to make you less likely to binge-drink; and then life events, such as a boyfriend or girlfriend, is highly predictive."

Have your say at our Teenager Forum!

However, he cautioned the test would have limited value in testing one individual as it was not accurate enough.

"It is very broad, but you could identify a group of people - say, take 1,000 kids and find the top 200 at a higher risk - to give them special intervention."

Although 18 is the legal age to buy alcohol in the UK, every week at least 13% of under-age teens drink beer or mixers. Around 9% of deaths in young people between the ages of 15 and 29 (about 320,000) are related to alcohol consumption.

However, brain scans cost thousands of pounds per person. A simplified version of the test, focusing on relatively cheap personality and family history factors, is more likely to be used.

Hugh Perry, chairman of the Medical Research Council neurosciences and mental health board, said: "Addiction and substance misuse is a major medical, social and economic problem for the UK.

"The UK government spends more than £15bn annually in meeting the cost of drug-related social and economic harm."

He said further research could "lead to breakthroughs in this field and provide compelling evidence to inform public health policy and lay the groundwork for the design of interventions".

The findings will also be applied to other fields, including drug abuse and smoking.

Do you think teenagers need testing for drinking? What's your teenage drinking experiences? How should alcohol be tackled by parents?

Have your say at our Teenager Forum!

What I wish I'd known as a first time parent

By Sarah Welsh Jul 18, 2014 Parentdish.co.uk

Don't panic, you're fine...

Parenting hindsight is a wonderful thing. If your befuddled baby brain can think back far enough to those nerve-wracking early days as a newbie mum or dad you might recall scrabbling around for any 'golden nuggets' of information likely to help with the panic gripping you on a daily basis.

When is it OK to admit that you're squeamish about breastfeeding?
Does baby led weaning actually just translate to 'please trash my kitchen, child'?
And, why the hell will they not stop screaming?!

It's amazing how much your perspective on all things child changes with your second or (gulp) third baby. But what comes with hard-earned and sleep deprived experience is often little help by then.

The one fact of parenting that seems to apply to all is that you have to experience it for yourself to really cotton on to just how tough, and amazing, the journey ahead is going to be.

But in case it may be of help, here's what I wish I'd known from the outset...

1. You can leave a crying baby
Not totally to his or her own devices you understand, but babies sometimes cry for no reason and you're allowed to finish that cuppa – or more likely finish stacking the dishwasher – before turning all your attention to the reasons for the latest grumble.

Your baby is not going to break into pieces if you leave him for a few minutes – plus you're actually doing him a favour. Wait until there's a sobbing sibling to compete with...

2. Thank god for Steve Jobs!
The inventor of the iPad didn't just create a technological buzz – he unwittingly earned himself the slavish gratitude of parents everywhere. Tablets = precious toddler entertainment and a bit of peace for you! Besides she'll need to use use one at school so if you think about it it's really an 'educational' tool...(The same can also be said of 'Beebies')

3. Parenting bibles can harm as much as they help
It might taking flicking through a few, but most parents reach the conclusion that trying to slot your child into some expert's 'fool-proof' routine is flirting with disaster from day one.
And obviously burn any books that condemn the use of disposable nappies or declare you to be a slack parent if you're not showered and breakfasted by 8am.

4. Beans on toast is a balanced meal
It's sod's law that any meal lovingly prepared organically and from scratch will be flung at the wall in favour of fish fingers and frozen peas, again. And surely skinning and de-seeding tomatoes for someone under one is just bonkers

5. Comparison is the root of all evil
Don't line up your own children against their friends or your friends' children – they're all different. If your baby goes to bed at 10pm and wakes at 9am it's fine, so long as it works for you. There's no such thing as the 'right' way and all children get there, wherever that is, in the end.

6. Don't rate yourself against other parents (for similar reasons to above)
So you give your toddler chocolate when others don't? So what! Is it really going to lead to morbid obesity?
And those immaculately dressed mums with pristinely painted toenails who seem to be coping brilliantly, probably aren't behind closed doors.

7. Never ever check under your sofa cushions
You don't want to know what's lurking there...

8. Prepare to do things in public you never thought you would
This includes whipping out the potty in John Lewis, raising your voice in front of a large audience and using all manner of treats and IOUs to bribe your child.

9. Watch your standards slip
All parents start out with high hopes for the meticulous meal plans and lack of TV time in favour of museum outings they plan to lavish on their offspring. Then they give birth.
And then there's having more than one...

10. Don't get too comfortable
Everything is a phase – the good, the bad and the downright ugly. They all pass eventually

11. You are no longer in control – they are
While you used to choose when you ate, bathed, slept and socialised, those days are gone – at least for a while. So try not to beat yourself up about not showering, still being in grubby PJs at 7pm and feeling like you never get anything done except feeds and changes. Don't expect too much of yourself for a while – keeping a small person alive is achievement enough after all!

12. A packed schedule doesn't always mean a happy child
Don't feel you have to devise a packed social calendar for your child from their day of birth. Attending numerous classes might run you ragged when kids can be just as stimulated playing at home or tagging along on the weekly supermarket shop.

13. You aren't a 'bad mum' if you...
Let your baby fall asleep on you, feed your toddler cheese on toast two days in a row, lose your temper, have been known to use kid's TV as a 'babysitter', use treats as a way to get them to behave, haven't cracked toilet training by the time your friends have and on and on

14. Trust your gut instinct
Parental intuition is nearly always right...

Case study: Children’s centre Fathers’ Story Week celebrations

26 JUNE 2014

Martin Andrews, dads support worker at Grandpont Children’s Centre in Oxfordshire, writes:

I organise regular fortnightly Saturday morning stay and play sessions with male carers.

We have worked with the Fatherhood Institute previously on making the centre more father-inclusive, so I thought I would share some details of the Saturdads event we held on 14 June, when the theme was Fathers’ Story Week (you can find out more about FSW here). This was also followed by a storyteller activity at a local primary school fete to encourage dads to get involved in reading with their child.

Fathers' Story Week at Grandpont Children's Centre

What we did on the day

1. The team discussed with the dads at the centre about The Fatherhood Institute’s campaign to encourage fathers to read with their children every day (Fathers Reading Every Day: find out more on theFSW website) and handed out free book resources.

2. We arranged a ‘storytime’ for the dads and children delivered by the local library service, using materials from Bookstart that were themed around ‘superheroes’.

3. We made ‘superhero’ cards by taking photos of the dads at the session and then getting the children to turn their dad into a flying superhero.

4. We asked them for ‘selfie’ photos to contribute to the Fatherhood Institute’s Facebook campaign (a photo album appears on the FI Facebook page).

5. We invited children to dress up in their superhero costumes and engaged with dads to talk about the ‘super qualities’ they felt were important as carers of their children.

6. We organised a Baby Club for Dads ‘stay and play’ before the main drop in to encourage male carers to attend with their babies.

7. We followed up the morning session with an additional storyteller activity organised at the local St. Ebbes Primary School’s afternoon Fete.

Who attended

At Grandpont Children’s Centres Saturdads 14.06.14:

We had 13 male carers, including 2 male carers with babies.
We had 18 children from 1-5 years and additionally 4 babies from 0-1 years.
We had 1 contact visit.
We also had an official male volunteer helping to gain relevant experience to facilitate his adoption application.

St.Ebbes School Fete 14.06.14:

We had a 1 hour session with a (male) storyteller delivered to approx 15 children, with 5 male carers present.

Feedback

“It helps being able to meet other dads who use the Centre. I might not have used the Centre as much if there had not been a dads group, It’s nice to have a friendly male environment, where the dads can develop at their own pace and get some tips and advice.” [male carer]

“It was good to see so many dads at the storytime session.” [library professional]

“I attend the Saturdads sessions and greatly look forward to playing with my daughter at the Centre.” [Separated BME carer]

“As a new father with a baby its been a real bonus having somewhere local that is so supportive and geared towards dads.” [male carer with baby]

“I thought the Baby PEEP session was very good. It covered lots of interesting stuff like Treasure Baskets, Books for Babies and singing which i can try at home.” [male carer with baby]

Next steps

To follow up with regular storyteller sessions at the Children’s Centre Saturdads events and try out some more of the literacy activities provided by the Fatherhood Institute, such as a Dads Map or Dads Favourite Story (some of the free activities available as part of Fathers’ Story Week, downloadable for free from the website).

To disccuss with St.Ebbes school a way to involve more male carers by organising another invitation for men to read with their children at school, such as a Dads Book Day.

To continue Baby Club for Dads including Baby Massage and PEEP postnatal sessions for dads which focusses on male carers singing, talking and bonding with their baby.

This article is taken from the The Fatherhood Institute Website

Friday 18 July 2014

Things To Do Over The Weekend in and Around Oxfordshire

To find out what is on over the weekend via "Daily Info, Oxford" please click HERE

To find out what is on over the weekend via "Oxford Mail " please click HERE

To find out what is on over the weekend via "Jack FM" please click HERE

Barracks Lane Community Garden - Fun Day Sat 19th July

Saturday 19th July 2014

Garden Open and Volunteer Day

Garden volunteer days with Matt – every Saturday 11. am - 5.pm Matt welcomes any volunteers who want to drop in. There are lots of gardening and maintenance tasks big and small for all levels of ability and fitness. Everyone is welcome. If you want to contact Matt to talk about volunteering you can phone or text him on 07757262327 or email mjdmorton@gmail.com.

Saturday 19th July 2014

Chill Out Fun Day

12 noon – 4.00pm

A relaxed and fun day at Barracks Lane Garden for children and young people with additional needs and their families, friends and support workers.

We will be making bread, doing art stuff and bush craft activities, hunting for bugs, playing with sand and water and generally having fun. Refreshments, newspapers and a chill out zone!

The day is supported by Oxfordshire County Council Short Breaks and Chill Out fund and is free.

All most welcome

This article is from Barracks Lane Garden

Today and Upcoming Events

JUL11horse and groom caulcott bastille week end beer and music festivalHorse And Groom, Caulcott, OX25 4NDCategory: Beer Festival
JUL11CALDECOTT PRIMARY SCHOOL - ANNUAL SCHOOL FAIRCaldecott Primary School, Abingdon,Category: School Fund Raising
JUL12Oxford Moonlight Stroll 2014St Edwards School, Oxford, OX2 7NNCategory: Charity Event
JUL12vision wild runGreat Tew, Oxfordshire, OX7 4NPCategory: Sports
JUL12'Story of Oxford' Talk and Book SigningMuseum Of Oxford, Oxford, OX1 1BXCategory: Talk
JUL12Ping! OxfordVarious, Oxford,Category: Sports
JUL12Heathfield House Summer FeteHeathfield House Nursing Home, Blethchingdon, OX5 3DXCategory: Fete Or Fayre
JUL12Nearly New SaleSouthmoor Preschool, Southmoor, OX13 5DJCategory: School Fund Raising
JUL12BodFest'14Bodicote Church House, Bodicote, OX15 4DWCategory: Festival
JUL12AfterHours: Rhythm and Poetry with BG Records & Young Women's Music ProjectThe Pitt Rivers Museum,, Oxford, OX1 3PPCategory: Live Music Event

This article is from JackFM.co.uk

Friday 25 July 2014

Slade Park Fire Station - Open Day Sat 26 July

Slade Park Fire Station to stage an open day

A free fundraising event where locals can see how their fire station operates will take place in Headington on Saturday 26 July.

Things To Do Over The Weekend in and Around Oxfordshire

Resolving arguments in a stepfamily

What is bad behaviour really about?

Why children fight to get control

Getting our own needs met

How to put a name to feelings

Dealing with anger

Understanding what is underneath the behaviour

Making our own choices and helping children make theirs

Wednesday 23 July 2014

Have a Teenager Who Likes a Tipple ?

What I wish I'd known as a first time parent

Don't panic, you're fine...

Case study: Children’s centre Fathers’ Story Week celebrations

Case study: Children’s centre Fathers’ Story Week celebrations

What we did on the day

Who attended

Feedback

Next steps

Friday 18 July 2014

Things To Do Over The Weekend in and Around Oxfordshire

Barracks Lane Community Garden - Fun Day Sat 19th July

Saturday 19th July 2014

Garden Open and Volunteer Day

Saturday 19th July 2014

Chill Out Fun Day

Friday 11 July 2014

Free Family Fun Day Sat 12 July South Oxford Adventure Playground 11am - 4pm

Things To Do Over The Weekend in and Around Oxfordshire - Daily Info

Things To Do Over The Weekend in and Around Oxfordshire - Oxford Mail

Things To Do Over The Weekend in and Around Oxfordshire - JackFM

Today and Upcoming Events

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